“To succeed effectively, you must build supportive relationships that help you work toward your goals. To build those relationships, you need to trust others—and to earn their trust, you must be trustworthy, too.” -Stedman Graham
From 1957 to 1962, a popular game show called “Who Do You Trust?” broadcast on television. Edgar Bergen and then Johnny Carson were the hosts, so it was a fun show too. People participated in pairs, usually married couples. The premise of the show was that the contestants had to choose who would answer the questions in order to win prizes. The challenge for them was: “Who among you feels safe with this category? Who do you trust?”
Consider how well you could do in such a program. You may already be playing that game! Every day you answer the question of trust.
I know it’s very important to me that people trust me and I feel hurt when someone doesn’t trust me. In those cases, I usually reason that the person does not know me. They need to know that I am capable and true to my word. You deserve that same trust.
Where do we get the idea that we can’t trust people? What makes you think you can’t trust yourself? Get over those voices that give a negative perspective! This is related to the concept of “innocent until proven guilty.” Your life can be much easier if you start thinking “trustworthy until proven otherwise.”
Trust is wrapped in honesty and quality. Do you believe, honor and respect the other person? Do you have the confidence that they will fulfill their commitments with quality work? Do you give yourself this same level of confidence? If you are concerned about errors, are you confident that you can remedy the situation if there are errors?
Great managers reject the notion that trust must be earned. Marcus Buckingham and Curt Coffman debunk that theory in their book “First Break All the Rules: What Great Managers Do Differently.” This is what they had to say about great managers in their study. “They know that if you fundamentally don’t trust people, there’s no line, no point in time, beyond which people suddenly become trustworthy. They believe that if you expect the best from people, most people don’t. Sometimes the best is what you get.”
Start with yourself. The wise philosopher Goethe said: “As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.”
Self-confidence is the first secret of success.-Ralph Waldo Emerson.