Why you should talk instead of text

Technology has made communication instantaneous and real-time, I guess that would be an understatement because having a face-to-face conversation is instantaneous and real-time. When you remove the visual questions, facial expressions, sighs, and pauses that are noticeable in a face-to-face conversation, something is lost in the translation and understanding of what is being said.

The same difficulties can be said about video conferences. Although you can see the face of the person you are talking to, non-verbal questions are hidden from camera view; things like the speaker fidgeting, playing with the ring on his finger and stamping his foot on the floor are missed. When obvious cues are missing in the communication process, are we communicating effectively? The ability to adjust or change the course of a discussion or conversation is possible when you have facial expressions that show acceptance or doubt.

My preference is to talk to the person I am communicating with, face to face is ideal and over the phone is the second best way. Being able to hear the pauses, sighs, and background noises in a phone conversation are all part of the communication process. In telephone conversations, the level of interest of the person on the other end can be discerned or detected. Attitudes, emotions and disagreements can be felt and appropriate responses given when listening to certain verbal and non-verbal questions. Believe it or not, background noises can be helpful in the communication process.

While chatting with my son, he expressed his frustration at having friends who would rather text than talk on the phone. Surprisingly, a good friend of mine who I hadn’t seen in years preferred texting to talking. As I was texting back and forth one night, I said, “I’ll call you to explain the details, this is too much information to text,” he replied, “I’d rather text, I’m better at it.” I’d rather talk to a person than text because of the learning involved in the communication process.

I think your ability to interact and respond in a person-to-person conversation is greatly affected when you can only express your thoughts and feelings in text messages. In my experience, I have friends who are comfortable with texting as their preferred mode of communication and when speaking in a group, their vocabulary and ability to convey a thought or idea is limited to a select selection of words and phrases. A lot is lost in translation and understanding when you send a text message. There is little or no emotion in a text and it is easy to misunderstand the intent of what is being said.

When you have experiences of meaningful conversation and effective communication with family, friends, and coworkers, you grow as a person and learn more about people and how to be social. Texting can be useful and effective, but it shouldn’t be a supplement or substitute for good old-fashioned talking.

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